🗣️ Gist📍 Street Gist
🎖️CorporalThe day my brother's in-laws tried to auction our family name
J
5 months ago
Last year during harmattan, my younger brother Tunde came to my house in Ikeja looking like someone who just lost a case he was sure to win. I knew that face. I've seen it a hundred times in court.
He said he wanted to marry Chioma, a fine girl from a wealthy family in Enugu. Good news, I thought. Then he told me the bride price list. Chai.
Her people wanted ₦5 million cash, a brand new Honda, 50 bags of rice, 100 yards of lace material, and a complete living room set from a specific furniture shop in Surulere. I nearly choked on my tea.
Our father was retired. Mummy was still selling provisions in Oshodi market. We are not poor, but we are not 'drop ₦5 million for bride price' rich either. I sat Tunde down and asked him one question: 'Does Chioma know what her family is demanding?'
He said she was embarrassed but couldn't go against her parents. I told him the law is clear on this. Section 3 of the Marriage Act does not set any mandatory payment for bride price. Customary marriage requires consent and token, not a ransom demand. If they want to drag this to court, they will lose.
But this was not about law. This was about family. I had to choose between backing my brother's happiness and protecting our aging parents from financial ruin. I called the girl's father myself. Introduced myself as Chief Registrar, High Court of Lagos. I did not threaten him. I just explained that excessive bride price is not enforceable in any court in Nigeria. Then I offered what we could genuinely afford: ₦500,000, a gold necklace for the bride, and a promise to sponsor their younger son through university.
The man was quiet for a long time. Then he said, 'Your brother can marry my daughter. But if that university sponsorship fails, I will see you in your own court.'
Tunde and Chioma got married last December. The wedding was small but sweet. And the younger brother just gained admission to UNILAG. I dey tell you, sometimes the best way to win is to know what the law says and then act like you don't need to use it.
He said he wanted to marry Chioma, a fine girl from a wealthy family in Enugu. Good news, I thought. Then he told me the bride price list. Chai.
Her people wanted ₦5 million cash, a brand new Honda, 50 bags of rice, 100 yards of lace material, and a complete living room set from a specific furniture shop in Surulere. I nearly choked on my tea.
Our father was retired. Mummy was still selling provisions in Oshodi market. We are not poor, but we are not 'drop ₦5 million for bride price' rich either. I sat Tunde down and asked him one question: 'Does Chioma know what her family is demanding?'
He said she was embarrassed but couldn't go against her parents. I told him the law is clear on this. Section 3 of the Marriage Act does not set any mandatory payment for bride price. Customary marriage requires consent and token, not a ransom demand. If they want to drag this to court, they will lose.
But this was not about law. This was about family. I had to choose between backing my brother's happiness and protecting our aging parents from financial ruin. I called the girl's father myself. Introduced myself as Chief Registrar, High Court of Lagos. I did not threaten him. I just explained that excessive bride price is not enforceable in any court in Nigeria. Then I offered what we could genuinely afford: ₦500,000, a gold necklace for the bride, and a promise to sponsor their younger son through university.
The man was quiet for a long time. Then he said, 'Your brother can marry my daughter. But if that university sponsorship fails, I will see you in your own court.'
Tunde and Chioma got married last December. The wedding was small but sweet. And the younger brother just gained admission to UNILAG. I dey tell you, sometimes the best way to win is to know what the law says and then act like you don't need to use it.
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