Nigerian wedding guest dress code is a scam I swear

I attended a wedding in Wuse last weekend and I am still recovering. The invitation said 'strictly all white' and I spent ₦45,000 on a white lace gown from Garki market. Arrived there and the bride's aunties were wearing bright yellow and purple. I asked one of them, 'Aunty, is it not all white?' She said, 'Ah, my dear, the white is for the bridal train. We are family.'

So the dress code is only for non-family members? Then why call it a dress code at all? Every Nigerian wedding I have attended has a secret rule they do not tell you. 'Come with your own chair' is not a joke in some areas. 'No children' but the couple has seven godchildren each. 'No gifts' but they set up a POS machine at the entrance.

The funniest part was the MC announcing 'we have enough food for everyone' and by 6pm people were buying shawarma from the vendor outside. I have decided my next outing will be a naming ceremony. At least there, nobody lies about the jollof rice situation.