Marriage without a joint account is just dating with a ring

I have been watching married couples in Abuja for years now, both in my family and at work. And I notice something. The ones who keep their money completely separate, they always have tension when it comes to bills. The husband pays for this, the wife pays for that, they are calculating who spent more on groceries last month. It is exhausting to watch.

From where I sit, marriage is a partnership. If you cannot trust your spouse with your salary, then why did you say I do? My husband and I have had a joint account since our first month of marriage. We both contribute, we both withdraw when we need, and we discuss big purchases together. No hiding, no secrets, no my money versus your money mentality.

I know some people will say what about women who marry irresponsible men. That is a different conversation entirely. But for two responsible adults who chose each other, separate accounts create distance. Am I wrong?