The day my daughter asked me if God was sick and I had no answer

My daughter is 9. Last week she came back from Sunday school and asked me, 'Daddy, if God can do anything, why did he let Mrs Okafor's son die? She said he was a good boy.' I opened my mouth and nothing came out. For a minute I was just standing there in my own living room, a pastor with no words.

I have spent years telling young people that God has a plan, that we should not question, that everything works together for good. But here was my own child, looking at me with those eyes, and the theological answers I had memorised felt like cardboard. I sat down on the floor with her and I said, 'Baby, I don't know. I really don't know. But I know that it hurts God too.' She nodded and went back to her colouring book.

That night I could not sleep. I kept thinking about all the times I have given quick answers to people in pain. The thing about life is, sometimes the most honest thing you can say is 'I don't know.' Our people say when you are holding a child's hand in the dark, you do not need to describe the darkness. You just need to hold on. I am learning to hold on and let God be God without pretending I understand everything.