I borrowed money I knew I could never repay from my best friend of 12 years

I dey think am today and my chest still heavy. Last year, my friend from UNILAG, Tunde, borrowed me 350k because my side hustle don die and rent was due. I told am say I go pay back within 4 months. I knew that day say I no fit pay am back. I just dey deceive myself.

I used the money to pay rent and buy food, then I started avoiding his calls. When we finally talk, I told am say my client don owe me, that one more month. That month become six months. Tunde never shout, never curse me, he just say 'Deji, I trust you.' That one pain pass any insult.

I don start paying am small small now, 20k every month. But the shame dey follow me. E don teach me say when you borrow money wey you know you no fit repay, you don kill the friendship before the money even enter your account. God when I finally finish, e go still never be the same.