🤫 Confess✈️ Japa/Travel
I Japa'd to Canada with a Master's Degree. I Now Clean Offices at Night.
S
Spiral Hornbill from Yola
about 2 months ago
I was 34 when I left Abuja for Calgary. My wife and I sold our land in Kubwa to fund the relocation. Everybody in the family said I was the lucky one. The one who escaped. Two years later, I am mopping floors in a downtown office building from 10pm to 6am. My MSc in Economics is in a drawer somewhere. Nobody in Canada cares. They want Canadian experience. How do you get Canadian experience when nobody will give you a chance? Na so the cycle dey go. My wife stopped talking to me the way she used to. Not fighting. Just silence. She works at a grocery store during the day. We pass each other in the kitchen like strangers sharing a hostel. The cold outside is nothing compared to what is happening inside our apartment. Last year December, my mother called from Enugu asking when we are coming home for Christmas. I told her work is busy. I could not tell her that I cannot afford the flight. I could not tell her that I cry in the car before every shift. The shame is the worst part. Not the cold, not the racism at the warehouse where I did weekends before this one, not the way people look at you like you are invisible. The shame of wanting to go back but knowing you cannot. Because going back means admitting that the dream was a lie. I am not writing this to discourage anybody. Japa is real. But nobody told me that the loneliness would follow me across the ocean. Nobody told me that a man can be surrounded by people and still feel like he is drowning alone. If you are planning to travel, ask yourself this one question. Are you running towards something, or are you running away from something? Because if it is the second one, the thing you are running from will be waiting for you at the airport.
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