The Abuja Wedding That Cost Me My Entire December Salary

My cousin's wedding invitation came with a 'aso ebi' fabric that cost ₦45,000. Just the fabric. Not the tailoring, not the shoes, not the gele. I looked at the message for a full two minutes before I replied 'Noted.'

Then the bride's mother called me directly. 'Zainab, you know you are one of the senior cousins. We are doing a uniform for the family. The lace is ₦85,000. And we are contributing ₦50,000 for the cake.' I said Alhamdulillah and hung up. My husband asked me what happened. I told him nothing, just that we are attending a wedding in December.

From where I sit in Abuja, weddings have turned into a second rent. You budget for transport, hotel, gift, aso ebi, and by the time you finish, your January salary is already crying. And if you don't show up, they will say you are proud because you work in the capital. I have seen this play out before. How do people survive December weddings without borrowing?